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The Beta the Better

“the women that appear on this show probably would do better with a man that is more beta or softer…” - @_theCivilRight

As per Urban Dictionary:

An alpha male is a man who takes charge, one who imposes his will on others, not the other way round. Other men want to be him, women want to be with him. An alpha male intimidates...”

“A beta male is a man who lacks masculine energy and adopts feminine characteristics, often faces problems or confrontations passive aggressively. A beta male is often taken advantage due to his "nice guy" persona.”



Why are we against dating a “soft” man?

The issue is what we equate to being “soft”. A beta man is a kind man, sensitive and less aggressive. This does not mean he is a push over or that he cannot provide for you. He willingly enjoys making people happy, listening to them and allowing them to do what they like.


Black women, from the time we are tall enough to wash dishes, we are taught to be strong, bend but don’t ever break, fight until the end. Black men, from birth, are taught to be strong, control it all, fight to the end. How will we both be in control of this ONE relationship? It’ll be a constant power struggle. For each person’s needs to be met, relationships need balance. Alpha’s meet the needs of Beta’s, as Beta’s meet the needs of Alpha’s. Two of the same just won’t work.


As an Alpha woman, I love a Beta man. He is kind to me, allows me to make decisions, he finances those decisions and will definitely take control when needed. I need to be free to be who I am. My Beta understands, the spotlight is mine. Always.


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